myfavoritesong.org

So, the wedding was fantastic! We had a great time and really appreciate all of our friends and family who spent the day with us. It’s not often that everyone you care about is in one room together. Weddings and funerals. That’s about it. And weddings are much happier occasions.

When friends or coworkers ask how I like marriage or how things are going, I always jokingly reply, “Well, we’re just waiting for the disillusionment to set in.” It’s not that I’m being cynical. You see, Brian and I spent months in premarriage counseling going through books that warned us marriage isn’t all butterflies and roses.

Disillusionment is something we often joke about. But usually I get all kinds of random responses from people when I reply with that. The security guard at my job told me that her marriage was great until they hit the 6-month mark. But my brother-in-law Vince told me not to expect it at all. Something tells me the key to avoiding disillusionment is having realistic expectations. The marriage books we read almost stressed it too much. We felt that they were taking a very negative stance toward marriage. But I also realize many couples get married with this idea that it’s going to be like a Hollywood movie. I think if one goes into it knowing it’s going to be incredibly hard work and, at the same time, incredibly rewarding, there is a better chance disillusionment can be kept at bay.

But what do I know? I’ve been married 11 days. I’m hardly an expert. The only thing I have learned in the past 11 days is not to expect Brian to make any kind of sense at 3 in the morning.

So, occasionally there are times when I feel like I am becoming a grumpy, old man and it’s a little disconcerting to me. And, then something small happens to me that makes me realize that I have a long, long way to go. This morning I went into the kitchen to get some water and one of the senior engineers was at the refrigerator. He said good morning to me and I returned the same. When I was about out the door, he shouts “Would it hurt you to say, ‘Good Morning’”? I told him I had, then he yells at me, “Well, why don’t you speak up?” It made me laugh, kind of like when I was laughing last evening when the dogs crapped at the playground. I don’t know. They can crap anywhere else and it doesn’t amuse me. When they crap at the playground, I am thoroughly amused. I stand there with a huge, dorky smile on my face while I am waiting. Of course, in my mind, I am picturing a little kid coming down a slide and falling into a huge pile of canine fecal matter. What could be more amusing? Of course, too, the kid is coming down head first. And, there is a big SPLAT. Anyways, I am not a grumpy, old man, yet. That was verified today. And though Tim is an asshole to everyone in the office, I find amusement in his grumpiness, especially since he isn’t that old. It’s terrible to be a grumpy, old man before you’re even old.

This past weekend, our goal was to get the invitations printed, stuffed into envelopes, stamped, and mailed. We failed miserably. I managed to print them all, and with the help of my good friend Erin, my parents, and Brian, we got them all ready to go out. As Brian was stuffing the last envelope, he pointed out that I had listed the wedding date as October 20, 2006. That’s last year. 2006.

So the invitations did not go out. My quality control stinks. I had 4 other people look at those invitations and nobody managed to catch the wrong date which leads me to the conclusion that it’s probably safe to send the wrong ones out. Obviously the year isn’t an important piece. But I have to redo them. I just have to. There are so many things in my life life that I have no control over that I’m a perfectionist about things I can control. I figure there are three reactions I would get from my guests upon seeing the incorrect invitations: (1) There are the guests who wouldn’t even notice the misprint. (2) There are guests who would notice it right away and call or email me to let me know I had goofed up. (3) And then there is the group who would notice the misprint, laugh hysterically, and call me a dork. The latter group consist of my sisters and close friends. My New Year’s vow this year was to stop doing things that expose me to ridicule. It’s not working out so well and it’s only September!

I’m beginning to realize we waited way too long to book a photographer. The biggest problem in this whole planning-a-wedding thing is that Brian and I have no clue about the timing of things. We did manage to pin down a fantastic caterer so at least we’ll be eating well at this shindig of ours. We may not have photos or flowers or a tux or guests for that matter, but we have all the REALLY important things… the rings, the pastor, and the food.

I don’t care what anyone says… Planning a wedding is no fun at all. I can totally see why wedding coordinators exist, although I’m not entirely certain how mentally stable they are. Who in their right mind would choose such a career? Someone who enjoys stress, enjoys working with psychotic brides, and loves hard deadlines. Brian and I have been looking at invitations, talking to caterers, and thinking about music. We just began searching for a reasonably-priced photographer. And we haven’t even thought twice about a florist.

All this planning makes me really wonder about the reasons behind why we are doing all of this. Not so much why we’re getting married, but why are we doing what everyone who has a wedding does? It just seems excessive when all we really want is for all our favorite people to be present and witness to us committing ourselves to each other. All I’m saying is I better not see one crumb left on our guest’s plastic plates. Everyone better EAT IT ALL ’cause we’re paying good money for it. And you better enjoy it as well…or else.

Um…so this man whose wheelchair got stuck in a semi-truck’s grill and was pushed down a highway at speeds of 50mph… He sounded all calm in his interview. I’d be freaking out. I can’t believe that guy was basically a hood ornament for miles and all that resulted from that was a few worn-down tires. Amazing.

What’s driving me nuts is the plain banner on this site. I’ve got to get my act together and give this place some character.

So as you know, Brian and I are engaged. This news came as a shock to those of you who didn’t even know I was dating anyone. My weblogging philosophy has always been that I don’t write much about other people other than my family. And family has always been fair game because, well…they’re related to me. Making random appearances on my site is part of the hazard of being family to me. When my brother-in-law Vince married in, he was no longer immune. I try not to damage his career by posting pictures or writing about him too much though. So now that we are engaged, Brian will show up frequently in my writing… Especially if we are fighting about something. I mean, what’s more healthy to a marriage relationship than airing all our dirty laundry online? I bet you just can’t wait.

So what you don’t know is that we put a contract down on a house about a month ago. And we go to closing on June 28. Needless to say, there is much going on for us. More about the house later…

So, I moved sites…kind of. Why, you ask? Well, for a multitude of reasons:
1. Greater anonymity. It’s not as though I’m trying to hide from people. If I wanted complete privacy I certainly wouldn’t be putting my life out on the internet. And as it is, I don’t really post about things I don’t want The Internet knowing. But at the same time, I rather not anyone be able to type my name in a search engine and — BAM — up comes my site. It’s somewhat unnerving. So I’m not using my full name here and am certainly not using it in the domain name.
2. Brian. I wanted to have a site for the both of us. Something we can do together. He‘s new to this and I’m not sure if he’ll really get into it like I have, but I‘m pressuring him to.
3. Wedding. I wanted to have a place to house all the wedding detail for our guests.
4. Something new. I thought I’d give WordPress a whirl.

So bear with us. This site is a work-in-progress. As time goes by, we’ll be adding more stuff.